Sweet Baby, Sour Cancer

My journey through cancer and pregnancy, twice.

Monday I met my plastic surgeon (who I’ve been referring to as Dr. Build a Boob or Dr. B.A.B.). And let me tell you Dr.B.A.B. is E.A.S.Y. on the eyes. I feel so lucky to have such a handsome doctor touching… I mean rebuilding a new boob for me ;). Dr. B.A.B. is quite literally Richard Gere in Pretty Woman (except younger, and waaaay better looking). As much as I joke about my good looking surgeon, I have nothing but the upmost respect for him as my doctor and even more so for other man sitting in the exam room— my wonderful boyfriend for life, a.k.a my husband Nate (who is even better looking than Richard Gere, hands down). But come on, this is a blog about boobs and boobs are fun- everybody loves them! I have to have some fun with this whole boob thing. And…since Dr. B.A.B.(a.k.a. Richard Gere) and I made it to second base on our first meeting it feels like maybe I have a right to question the bounds of our patient doctor relationship.
The exam was quite an experience and most definitely an exam that I won’t forget.
So, I am waiting in the exam room in my cute little hospital gown… not! Undressed from the waist up. I am really unsure how this is all about to go down (and I’m of course, super nervous). So many thoughts running through my head. Then walks in Dr B.A.B. OMG! And I think great, this guy is about to see me 1/2 naked and examine me, yes! Then, I think oh shit, this guy is going to see me 1/2 naked – I just had a baby. Not cool.  As every good MD should be— Dr. B.A.B was professional in every way … Me on the other hand not so much. Of course being super nervous and totally insecure of my post partum body,  I am making inappropriate boob jokes that I don’t think anyone found funny. In fact I don’t think anyone even knew what I was talking about and just thought I was babbling nonsense. Which now that I look back on- I think I was😁. We talked for sometime and then came the exam. I stand up for Dr. B.A.B. open my gown, take a breath and let it all hang out. The breast exam actually went smoothly and I wasn’t as embarrassed as I thought I would be with some other mans hands on my boobs measuring them, lifting, moving them all around. But the exam wasn’t over yet!   I am hearing the words breast frequently and other words like nipple and nipple sparing. At one point I start to chuckle a bit because it was just surreal to be there having to go through that… and I guess I am still immature and crack up at silly words like nipple and boob.
The appointment went really well and  because of my diagnosis and my current anatomy, I have plenty of choices to get a what they call good cosmetic result. Dr. B.A.B examined me and made his suggestion that I am the perfect candidate for a DIEP flap surgical procedure. The flap part means that they take a “flap”‘ of skin from somewhere (my belly) and re-create a new breast out of out. I am lucky enough that I just had a baby and have lots of extra unwanted fat and skin around my belly . So walluh, my baby belly gets turned into a boob. Crazy huh?!
Now it just gets better- Dr B.A.B asks me to unbutton my pants and lower them a bit and lay down on the table. Of course I start to get a little like “oooo la la what’s happening”— only to be pinched out of my fantasy when he starts grabbing my flab!!! Seriously, he starts grabbing my belly and pinching all sorts of inches to make sure there is enough there. At one point he pulls it all together trying to make like an actual boob mound on my belly. How humiliating! There goes my fantasy relationship with Richard Gere! I then have to raise my legs off the table so my abs get tight, he remarked I might not be able to do it- insisting that my core was weak but you bet your sweet butt I raised my legs right up and held them there strong as can be.  The least I could do is show off that Ihave a six pack- even if it’s hiding under that layer of baby fat. ( I was DYING to drop them but no way in hell). I then continued on with my inappropriate babble making comments about my weight, baby belly etc… So, um yeah, I think I handled this situation really, really well.
So after all the inch pinching, we decided that we will remove my right breast and my other surgeon will do that part. Nothing but a shell will remain- that should mean ALL the cancer is gone! Then Dr. B.A.B will come in and start the reconstruction process. He will put in a tissue expander or spacer underneath my chest muscle. The bottom of the muscle will be cut and a hammock will be sewn in for the temporary implant to sit in. The spacer will be filled 1/2 way during surgery and I will have weekly visits to see Dr B.A.B so he can inject saline through a port under my skin and continue to inflate the spacer till it gets to desired size- DD! Haha – JK! The spacer will stay in till 6 months after radiation is completed. Then we will go ahead with the flap procedure. So yeah, this too is a process.
I initially thought that since I opted for the mastectomy I would get out of radiation. However it’s not looking that way. Due to my age, my breast cancer is more aggressive than others and that there was some cancerous cells in my lymph nodes that hadn’t set up shop- radiation is just another insurance policy to prevent this crap from returning and killing me. Since radiation changes the texture and shape of the skin and can potentially burn the skin is why we wait till 6 months after to give the skin time to heal and see what kind of shape it’s in.
So this is all taking place January 13! Lucky 13! I will have more to say as the date gets closer. I think this is enough for now.

One thought on “Dr. B.A.B (build a boob) part 2

  1. Linda says:

    You are sooo funny and serious at the same time. I guess if you lived in Hollywood, you’d end up being the Dolly Parton of our street!
    But, I think you’ll be you … Once again !
    That’s what you and Nate and Cora will have,their wife and mommy back, better than ever. Praying for you,Jodi 🙏🏼


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: